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Mindfulness And Flirting
By Maya Talisman Frost, Fri Dec 9th
Have you ever been called a flirt? Good for you! You see, flirting is an excellent indication that you are PayingAttention.
In fact, it is impossible to flirt without being mindful. Youcan’t be all wrapped up in your thoughts, or distracted byworries about tomorrow. You are Right There, in the moment,picking up on subtle signals and dealing out your own. Mindfulness requires these four steps: •Noticing something new (“Hmmm…he’s attractive.”) •Makingdistinctions (“I like his eyes when he smiles.”) •Shiftingperspectives (“He dresses like a jock but he’s a musicteacher.”) •Staying fully present (“He’s flirting with me!”) Flirting requires “people” smarts—interpersonal intelligence—butit’s also a great opportunity to flex your spatial intelligence(seeing visual cues) and bodily/kinesthetic intelligence(picking up on body language and using appropriate touch to makea connection). A good flirt can scan a room and see all kinds ofoptions for relationships! And it doesn’t have to be about finding your life-long—or evenall-night-long—romantic partner. You can use mindfulness andflirting to help you create more meaningful connections in aplayful way with your
neighbor, your grocery clerk, yourbarista, even someone waiting next to you in line. Don’t think of flirting as something only desperately singlepeople do. No, no, no. Consider it a tremendous exercise ininterpersonal mindfulness. The first step in flirting is noticing something. The blue ofyour waiter’s eyes? The necklace your dry-cleaning lady iswearing? Your child’s teacher’s smile? Next step: Mentioning it. A quick and sincere comment like “Niceshirt!” is enough to create a connection and open up aconversation—and really, that’s the general goal of flirting. Mindfulness of others is a powerful skill that can help youbuild relationships in all settings. Flirting is nothing morethan being aware of others and taking advantage of what younotice in order to connect. Who said mindfulness has to be quiet, solitary andinner-directed? It can be spirited, social, and downright sexy. Notice. Smile. Connect. Repeat. Get out there and seize the moment!
About the author:Maya Talisman Frost has taught thousands of people how to payattention. Her playful and powerful eyes-wide-open approach tomindfulness has been featured in over 100 print and webpublications. To read her free special report, "The Dirty LittleSecret About Meditation," visithttp://www.Real-WorldMindfulness.com
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