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Successful Dating Begins With Successful Flirting
By Alison Edwards, Sat Dec 10th
Why are some people born natural flirts and others couldn'tcharm the backside of a bus if their life depended on it? The power of flirting goes beyond attracting the opposite sex.Master the art of flirting and you also become a friend magnetand can use your skills to influence business relationships. "You've either got it or you haven't!" is often what you willhear men saying when they boast about their conquests. Women, onthe other hand, are more coy when talking about a man they havemet. So as not to appear full of herself, she will often say toher friends "Oooh, I don't think he likes me, what do youthink?" If she is a successful flirt, however, she will bethinking along the same lines of a man, "Yeah, he was putty inmy hands!"
Flirting is an art requiring confidence without being OTT. Asuccessful flirt knows how to get the balance just right; toomuch and there is a real danger you will be labelled as "slimy"(if you're a man) and "tarty" (if you're a woman). If flirting doesn't come naturally to you, you can learn toflirt by building your confidence, believing in yourself andinteracting with other people. Here are some basic flirting tips which can be practised atwork and/or on a social scene. 1.Have Fun! First and foremost flirting is fun! Whether you are the flirteror the flirtee it makes both parties smile (on the inside aswell as the outside!). Don't take it seriously; be playful, belight-hearted, be infectious! 2.Ooze Confidence The best flirts have a positive outlook on life and are happywith themselves. To successfully flirt you need to feel goodabout yourself before you are able to transmit this "feel good"factor to the opposite sex. If you display a positive andoptimistic attitude to life you will find yourself connectingwith people who are right for you. 3.Make the first move Don't wait for someone to approach you. If it's someone at workyou've got your eye on, wait for them to go to the kitchen andthen make a beeline for the coffee machine. The same applies ina bar, wait for them to go to the bar and then squeeze in nextto them. Start with a simple "Hello" and take things from there.What have you got to lose? 4.Pay a compliment and receive a smile! A genuine compliment costs nothing and yet can make someonefeel so special. If someone looks great, tell them! If someonehas achieved something to be proud of, tell them! Once you startmaking someone feel good about themselves, they are more likelyto want to spend more time with you! And if someone pays you acompliment, be proud of the compliment and
say "Thank you"! 5.Eye to Eye Contact Eye contact is one of our most powerful communicatingmechanisms. Most people don't have a problem making eye contactwith someone they don't find attractive but they become awkwardin front of people they are attracted to. If you tend to lookaway at people you like, practice making eye contact with peopleon your way to work, a quick glance and then turn away. This isa good way to build up your confidence. Don't stare, however,this will make people feel uncomfortable! 6.Pitch your voice Learn to vary the tone, pitch and speed of your voice. A voicerich in tones sounds far more interesting than one dull note! 7. Listen A good flirt has the ability to get people to open up and talkabout themselves. Pay attention when someone is talking to youand ask questions to show you are interested. The best questionsare the ones which will lead to someone remembering a positiveexperience about themselves. 8.Move your body! There are many positive body language signs: lingering eyecontact, smiling widely, touching someone, head tilting to oneside, running fingers through hair, undivided attention but ifyou really want to let go and flirt openly - dance! Dancing is agreat form of self-expression allowing you to interact withsomeone and connect. 9. Smile, Smile, Smile! Make your smile contagious! The more you smile the more peoplewill want to know you and be around you! 10. Don't be rude! Flirting does not involve being sexually explicit! Nor does itinvolve being offensive if someone rejects your advances. If youhave been flirting with someone and are not receiving positivefeedback don't get disheartened or take it personally, move onto the next person! You may want to consider a differentapproach if you are getting a lot of rejections. 11. Send an email Emails are a great way to communicate with someone if you'retoo shy to approach them face to face. Whether it's someone youare interested in at work or you want to try internet dating,emails and instant messaging allow you to flirt without blushingor getting tongue-tied. Be careful not to become intimate online too quickly though;it's easy to paint a rosy picture of the person behind themonitor but until you have met them you don't really know them.My message here is get to know someone online before arranging adate, but don't fall in before meeting them! The realitycould burst the bubble!About the author:Alison Edwards writes articles for http://www.SnappyDates.coma UK based dating site for all age groups. Registration is free. For Snappy Results - try SnappyDates!
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